Where do I stand?

It's been 13 months, and I don't know where I stand in your life. Sometimes when you look at me, I see myself and be so happy to see you having me like that.
Times like today makes me feel ki sab toh bekaar ho gaya, woh pyaar, woh vaade. You don't need me. You need someone more than me. It hurts. It hurts a lot.
So many days, at the time you should need me the most, love me the most, you going far. I don't know what exactly I did wrong that I could never see you fight for us like you do for her, but jo bhi hai, I don't feel like being in love again. To give myself to someone else again. To make him touch me, or even look at me.
I wanna go away from all these, I don't wanna live more. :')