Community post
Gray 🕳️
I read somewhere that the pen is the tongue of the mind so I've decided to talk but with my pen 😊.
Pixabay
For the longest time, I've not been my usual self, I fell into a place I never thought I could be in, my physical health deteriorated, my mental health was in shambles and I lost touch with life for a while. I cut contact with family and friends, had crazy thoughts and allowed myself to wallow in them. It got to a point where my family became worried and began keeping in touch with me all the time to make sure I was okay. Mental health is not talked about enough in Nigeria, especially in the case of youths and late teens, one time I told two people about how I felt and one sent me short video of a boy pretending to shoot himself and said "a solution", the other told me it's because I've not had s.x for a long time, so I gave up telling people stuffs whenever I feel down. Most times it's just me and my overthinking mind wondering why I'm still a broke 22 year old with no job, not yet in a higher institution after numerous attempts, 7 years after my secondary school education. Different average skills with little to no recognition while my mates are scaling new heights and bagging degrees. I made up my mind to leave social media so I won't see all the amazing things my mates are doing (hence the break). I convinced myself I was doing well (probably because) I was taking a software engineering course but that failed and I started a business that's not really going well so I became more frustrated. After my friend lost her brother (my drama director) a few days ago, I've come to realize I shouldn't keep living in my mystery cause life is short, very short and we're not getting out of it alive.
I feel my mind gradually turning gray with the walls closing in on me each passing day. Suffocating! That's the word, I feel like I'm suffocating but I've decided to carry on no matter what life throws at me.
Replies (12)
Our mind is our worst enemy, for me we have own choice to do what we want in life, we have power to change what burdens we have right now and make an action to solve it. However, it's not an easy task, it requires large amount of confidence and self advise to continue in life no matter what situation is.
The person you told about your mental health and all he or she could think was to send you that kind of video was not being sensitive at all.
Mental health awareness is still very lacking in Nigeria sadly.
I hope that you find a way to figure things out and be better.
I noticed that you haven't been writing that much on hive like you use to in the past. Maybe you should try to write more offten, discover more communities. As writting can help one sometimes to have a clearer mind.
And also your image covers are not free to use, you might want to change them.
It's really not an easy task.
Thank you very much 😊
I'll try writing more often.
Thank you very much.
I got the pictures from pixabay so I thought they were.
I'll change them, thanks a lot 😊
You are welcome🥰
Yeah, some are free to use on Pixabay, just check the attribute to make sure the ones you are choosing are free.
Alright
Thanks 😊
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Oh dear, those people you opened up to said horrible things. Please be super selective who you share your problems with.
It's a good sign you're this aware and have picked yourself up. I sincerely hope you keep up this positive attitude and I pray everything works out soon enough for you
Sorry to hear of your friends brother! That’s horrible and yes indeed life is too short so we should do what we can to do it to the best of our abilities.
You don’t need a formal education to be successful, especially these days. There are so many things that we can learn on the internet, it just takes a little time and direction. You shouldn’t stress out too much because millions of other people your age are confused and not sure what to do. I’m hoping that you can figure something out, only you can know what you’re good at so take a step back and make a catalog of things you’re good at or enjoy, or would like to do and then work at it from there.
Thank you so much 😊
It's crazy how I find myself falling in and out of that hole but I promise to keep picking myself up.
Thank you very much and sorry for the late reply 🙏
I'll try doing so. Thank you very much 😊
I've tried looking at it from this perspective but I'm a big fan of formal education, I've built myself from an early age with the dreams of attending a tertiary institution at the right age so it's a bit hard to look at it from a different point of view.
Thank you very much 😊 and sorry for the late reply 🙏